"In a faraway land, long ago, there lived a King and his fair Queen. Many years they had longed for a child, and finally their wish was granted."- Sleeping beauty
Four...Four little peas, four little lambs, four little teeny tiny half me's and half him's....to this day it still blows my mind that we created four little lives at once. That at one point in time I had 5 hearts beating inside of me. (Counting my own) How is that even possible? How is that not in itself, magical?
Maybe instead of my fairy godmother turning four little mice into horses to pull my carriage she gave it an extra swish and flick and gave me four babies? Whatever the case, whatever the odds, me and Alex were over the moon excited. Scared shitless (pardon my french,) but excited.
At this time it seemed like I was counting down the says until I could find out what we were having. All boys? All girls? 2 boys? 2 girls? 3 girls 1 boy? I mean, my mind would just race with possibilities. Literally overtime I had an ultra sound- which at this time I probably had about 35! I would try and ask if they could see my kids parts. And it was always the same, "no, its to soon."
There are only four days in my entire pregnancy that I can actually say were fairly tale-esk. Just four.
One of them being the day I'm about to tell you about.
Amazing day 1:
Per our doctors request, we made an appointment with the reduction specialist Dr. in Los Angeles, CA. In my mind we were going to see this Dr. just show our Fertility Dr. we heard what he had said, but in my heart I was rolling my eyes at the fact I even had to entertain the idea of "reducing" one of my babies. I remember being so scared when we arrived at the specialists office. I thought I had been locked away in the farthest room in the tallest tower?? That was nothing compared to this. Crossing the bog of eternal stench, traveling into the deepest dungeon, we finally were in the Dr.s office waiting to be seen. I remember laying there on the bed and having three large monitors in front of me. The Dr. walks in, and in my mind she looks like the witch from Snow White trying to give me a poisonous apple. But in actuality she was a really nice white lady Dr....Anyway! she promoted me to pull up my shirt and pull down my pants so she can start the ultrasound. She looks around, looks around, looks around..and then finally asks me if id like to see my babies. "Of course," I said. She flips on the monitors and bam! There they are, the most beautiful little humans I've ever seen. Well, the most beautiful little gummy bear/alien looking things I've ever seen. :) Of course she talks about the benefits of "reducing" and how it will give the other babies a better chance of surviving, etc etc blah blah blah whomp whomp whomp. I felt like saying, look witch- I mean nice white Dr. Lady- Im just here cuz I have to be. But instead I decided to ask her if she could see the little parts of any of my babies. Figuring she would say "no its to soon" like all the other Dr.s I kind of just blurted it out not expecting her to say- "Well.. on ONE I can see for sure. But thats it." I immediately looked at my husband with the look of AHHHHHHHHHHHHH on my face. Now this moment, Im telling you..is hands down the BEST moment of my ENTIRE life. It wasn't winning championships, being crowned homecoming queen (oh wait that didn't happen), my first kiss, getting engaged, getting married, none of that. THIS, is hands down the greatest moment of my life.
The Dr. looks at me and very calmly says "Its a boy."
Now it may be different for other people... but for me and as a woman.. there is something about being told you are having a son that takes your breath away. Even now thinking about how I felt in that moment,I can't help but cry. Its as if my heart floats out of my chest to never never land. Once she told me that I remember looking at my husband and just balling my little brown eyes out. Our love had created a little boy, A tiny Alex. I was the mother of a son. Forever my heart would beat and belong to this little boy. No matter what my future held, I would never be alone..HE would never be alone.
These are the thoughts that ran through my head.
I remember getting in the car and just gazing out the window with tears rolling down my face. How, in a matter of moments did my life change completely? Everything just seemed so much sweeter. Music sounded softer, clouds seemed fluffier....I was the mother of a son. I was going to be having my very own little Prince and have to teach him to slay dragons and be gallant.
I was going to be having someone else's Happily Ever After.